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Like every lads holiday, the stag do in Butlins produced its own share of hilarious and memorable moments.  Here are the best of them as remembered by the Clubflat Team.

145 Hilarious Moments

1. Image having no fewer than 5 toilet stops in the last hour of the trip down, each time standing in full view of all passers by, sometimes just in the middle of an area of grass but in his head seemingly pretending he was doing it hidden behind a tree.

2. Bluff taking ages to find a discrete place to pee, only to have someone still tap on their window at him.

3. People not being able to get into their lodges due to not having the key card, waiting around, then after finally being let in finding that the patio door was open anyway.

4. Everyone losing door key cards at some point.

5. Three nights, three different beds.

6. Hero in Finnigans sending his chicken and chips back three times until they got it right.

7. Finnigans slogan "The Great British Takeaway" being run by immigrants who could barely speak English and who thought a chicken quarter breast was a southern fried chicken fillet.

8. Dale putting Hero's wristband on so tight it made his hand go white.

9. The amazing Butlins zip wire that Laze enticed us all with in his stag arrangement emails which was no-where to be seen when we got there.

10. Lodge number 1 please becoming the "place to go" to take a dump in.

11. Electro Kid and Hero heaving Dale up to a ridiculous height so he could slap a sticker on the underneath of the big blow-up cube hanging from the ceiling in Centre Stage.

12. Deciding which of the three of them should be the one to be heaved up to do the deed with Electro Kid's analogy deciding it… "It has to be Dale, he only weighs 9 pounds".

13. Shag without his Hulk Hogan wig and just the bandana becoming a "Somali pirate".

14. The uncontrollable hysterics as Happy Larry aka Prof. Brian Cox did some teapot dancing to Shania Twain's "You Don't Impress Me Much", and just as he had everyone's attention, the lyrics saying "So you think you're a rocket scientist?"

15. Quick Buck finding 'Old Stu' in the Sun & Moon pub and going out his way to show Stu the older version of himself, then Stu wanting a photo with his older self.

16. Nobody owning up to a pair of shoes that got left behind (still suspected to be Happy Larry's!) and the constant reminding of "Don’t forget your shoes" every time Chuggsy stopped somewhere.

17. Hero losing his Nike hoody for two days and The General finding it as we were leaving in Quim's bed saying he had been sleeping with it up his arse crack.

18. The Hulk Hogan's who looked nothing like Hulk Hogan.

19. Not being able to describe what type of accommodation we had and so calling it everything under the sun, and always in a Post Office counter type voice:-

"Chalet number 2 please",

"Cabin number 1 please",

"Flat number 3 please",

"Van number 2 please",

"Villa number 1 please",

"Apartment number 3 please",

"Lodge number 2 please",

"Hut number 1 please".

20. All of us watching in horror as bus load after bus load of chavs and fat slags rolled into the parking lot which led to Electro Kid asking for his money back and stating he wanted to go home.

21. Playing late night poker in Hut number 1 please and looking around after hearing Image giggling to find a ridiculous balancing act of 6 wine glasses on top of each other with a plate on top of the very top one, then a vodka bottle nested on top of the plate.

22. Quick Buck and Laze looking out of their window in the morning to see two nice girls up in the concentration camp blocks.  As the girls waved they proceeded to bum each other violently with Laze bashing his hand against the window.  Girls then stuck up their fingers and pulled their curtains across in disgust.

23. After the bumming incident in the window, the same girl trying again the next morning to wave at Laze and Quick Buck, only to get back a "Show us your tits" hand gesture from them. Curtain is pulled harshly across again.

24. Toxic Waste sweets.

25. The Danger Kitchen setup encompassing:-

- Vodka bottle and wine glasses dangling off the edge of the work surface,

- Dirty knife pointing outwards for someone to walk into,

- Tap needlessly running,

- Fridge & freezer doors wide open,

- Chair balanced on top of the cupboard,

- Bread bin sticking out ready to fall off the work surface,

- And the best which wasn't even part of the mock set up – the toaster on the open oven hob.

26. Cafe Disco (Stu's night club).

27. Splash Waterworld being referred to as Cancer & AIDS (C & A for short).

28. The walk back from C & A in front of everyone with the Mum towels riding high.

29. Mini Golf – reinventing the game so if you didn't hit the obstacles, you couldn't proceed.

30. Image looking at a bunch of 2p coins Hero had won on the penny pushers and declaring he'd love to throw them all.  Hero outstretching his hand of coins and Image then launching them across the amusement area.

31. Electro Kid referring to the Butlins complex as "One big service station".

32. Ste not sleeping for a whole night.

33. Plastic ball bearing gun fights at point blank range.

34. Every lodge being peppered with yellow plastic ball bearings.

35. The Bazooka Vultures aka the cleaners waiting for precisely 10am on Monday morning to nuke the shell that once used to be a luxury lodge – regardless of whether you were in there or not.

36. Waking up to broken glass every morning.

37. Happy Larry getting in drunk, having the coherence to charge up his phone in his and Stu's room but then going off to sleep in Image's bed for 2 hours.  Then upon stumbling out later saying "Don't tell Parkes".

38. The skittle holder that broke during bowling and looked like a yokels teeth.

39. Happy Larry getting lost whilst drunk and phoning his Mum, only to be text back the next day "You OK?", which then became an affirming "You're OK", which then became translated into "You're a jOKe".

40. Bluff's missus phoning hospitals after he also got lost drunk and phoned her, then cut off and has no signal for hours as she tries to get back hold of him.

41. Ste taking a picture of Hero in his Mum Towel declaring "That is the most disturbing picture I've ever taken".

42. Carl nicking Ste's bed.

43. Hero thinking he was sleeping next to Ste, then finding him attempting to sleep in a sitting upright position on the sofa as Carl was in his bed.

44. The mythical poker playing Porty Porter.

45. The sneaky visits by all to Lodge number 1 please to rape the last toilet roll held captive there.

46. Quim the Assassin dressed all in black with his James Bond polar neck looking like the Milk Tray advert man: "All because the lady loved Bourbon Creams".

47. The light cord and towels in Van number 1 please that became brown following the communal use of Hulk Hogan fake tan.

48. Using the children's mini-diggers to "dig our own graves for later".

49. Quim spewing into the flowers whilst everyone just sits casually around and waits for him to finish.

50. Giving a random fit bird a Clubflat card on Sat night, only to be told she had already been given one the night before.

51. Two sheets of Clubflat stickers being used to hold up the Hulk Hogan poster.

52. Image getting wedgied by some bird as he walked out of Centre Stage.

53. Finding an exact replica of Laze.

54. Image and Hero extremely drunk playing extremely dangerously in the kid's playground on the way back to the lodges.

55. Hot dogs every night in Centre Stage.

56. Seeing a bloke in his late forties / early fifties actual piss himself whilst waiting for the urinal, with it dripping out the bottom of his knee length shorts, down his calf and onto the floor.

57. The scary tree with a face, head and arms.

58. Switching the 'Male' and 'Female' signs around in the Cancer & AIDS swimming pool.

59. People attempting to talk but being so mashed from the night before that just a garbled noise came out their mouths.

60. Pete buying a 1ft hotdog and as it was so nice, going back to get 2 more and eating them all.

61. Electro Kid's silent assassin position with the BB gun, clicking away firing ball bearings at people.

62. Someone using a bandana to wipe their arse as there was no paper left.

63. Happy Larry going for a dump knowing there was no toilet paper, but then just getting straight in the shower to solve the problem.

64. Seeing the bird from over in Caravan number 7 please having a shower through a slightly ajar window.

65. Just a dirty brown towel lying on the floor by the toilet in one of the cabins.

66. Following the first night, Electro Kid walking into the room he should have slept in just in time to see Bluff wake up and say "Ow" as he hit his head off the headboard.

67. Minutes later, opening the shut door of the same bedroom hitting Bluff who was sat on the floor... another "Ow".

68. Image's comment to Electro Kid... "That's the best example I've ever seen of someone not understanding something, while nodding to say they do", as Ste tried to explain the storyline to Avatar.

69. Queuing and debating about queuing for ages for Jacks nightclub.  Finally getting in and three songs later all revellers being chucked out as the toilets were flooding.

70. The forward cartwheel and front flip combo from the most freakishly fit, but unhealthily looking games master at Butlins.

71. A streaker being chased by the aforementioned freakishly fit but unhealthily looking games master.

72. The General trying to dupe everyone to walk the half marathon to the Wetherspoons in Minehead for breakfast only to get there and find they only did roasts.

73. Quim losing the top off the salt shaker into his fried egg along with most of the salt.

74. After scooping up and replacing the top, Quim proceeding to shake yet more salt on the rest of his plate.

75. Image's deconstructed breakfast sandwich.

76. Hero drenching the C & A pool lifeguard as he parted the water like Moses when his dinghy hit the pool of water at the bottom of the boat slide.

77. The clocks going forward and losing one hour's sleep whereas Ste lost a whole night.

78. Ste kneeling down and almost falling asleep from the stress of carrying a bowling ball 6 yards to the lane during his 48hr day.

78. When attempting to sit down outside on the grass, Hero tumbling and spilling some of his drink but managing to save the rest, only to then sit down where someone else had spilled their drink moments earlier.

80. Ste being persuaded by the person serving him to buy a meal deal at Burger King, spending the extra 11 pence, then having to shout across the bar at the same bellend that then didn't give him his drink.

81. Pizza Hut's idea of an all-you-can-eat buffet.

82. Quim nearly killing several of the Clubflat Team on the way down there by drifting across his lane and almost crashing into the central reservation.

83. Stu behind in his car seeing this and phoning Shag to ask, "What the fuck just happened?", then saying "Tell him he needs to stay between the white lines".

84. Laze and Shag going to get the lodge keys from reception only to be told they had to go to VIP check in which was busier and miles further.

85. The video of Electro Kid dancing, then falling over with an opportunist thief nicking off with his Hulk Hogan bandana.

86. Electro Kid's genuine anger when he saw the video footage of his bandana theft from the night before.

87. Laze pretending he loved Bradley when leaving the S Club 2 gig, throwing his arms around him telling him he was great.

88. Bradley from S Club 2 believing Laze when he told him he was great.

89. Mates slating mates for trying to talk proper English.  Fun Bobby: "My tongue is killing", pronouncing it 'tong' with Ste looking shocked at his pronunciation.  Fun Bobby then says back: "Don't you know what a 'tong' is?".  Ste's reply: "No, issss a TUNG AY IT".

90. Electro Kid's world record slow bowl that trundled so slowly snails overtook, but somehow directly hit the last pin to get him a half strike.

91. Image not even questioning wearing the skimpy Hulk Hogan pants even though there were a spare pair of trousers because we thought there is NO WAY he will wear these.

92. Happy Larry "having" to put back the cheapest bottle of vodka ever when he sees Laze buying a huge bottle of the good stuff.

93. The unparalled arrogance of saying to some random bird, "Just so you know I'm married so I’m not going to shag you".

94. Cyberdog somehow drinking a litre of Vodka before even leaving Chalet number 3 please.

95. The water feature of Cafe Disco.

96. Whilst walking back from town, Stu's relentless slating of the bikers with the best comment being "They need to stop all this motorcycle fuckery".

97. Hero catching Cyberdog peeing right outside Chalet number 2 please rather than spend the energy to walk inside, with it going virtually on / around Quim’s car wheel.  Cyberdog then turning round whilst peeing and saying "SSSHHHHH", only to have Hero then instantly take a photo of him.

98. Quick Buck getting it completely wrong and dragging a pissed bloke back to Chalet number 1 please instead of a bird.

99. Quick Buck making the aforementioned gaffe by first duping his victim with a can of beer and a promise of a "friendly" game of poker - his usual trick.

100. Zebradee Zebra Dick.

101. Laze pointing out that regardless of everything silly on the photo of Quim, Quick Buck only notices his zebra dick.

102. Food Liar Cyberdog.

103. The generally shocking state of Carl on the last night; head in hands, veg'd on the couch and not even making it out.

104. Electro Kid nearly knocking Quick Buck out with his mini-digger arm due to his elation at being the one to get his toy digger to work first.

105. Trying to lift 14 stone adults up on the bucket of the mini-digger and it failing miserably with an unhealthy grinding noise.

106. The General persistently shouting "Hurry Up" to everyone else so HE could go out and drink.

107. Being repeatedly told to "Hurry Up" becoming so annoying that you hurried up.

108. Cyberdog going mad at the loss of his iPhone only to find it clearly in full view on the sideboard by the TV.

109. Bluff deciding mid-way through the night that he didn't like the fact he looked like Andy Pipkin in his Hulk Hogan outfit and changing out of the vest, only to change back into it 30 mins later on the basis it suddenly dawned on him he was wearing no costume and was the odd one out.

110. Being told losing your paper wristband and needing a new one would cost £50.

111. Laze actually attempting to sit on the chair on top of the cupboard in 'Danger Kitchen' and only aborting as the ceiling was in his way of climbing on the chair (a disaster only marginally avoided).

112. Image's state when he got in on the last night – maniacally chuckling to himself and again throwing copper coins all over the room.

113. The careless fool in Hut number 3 please who gaffed an entire precious bog roll down the toilet and then said nothing.

114. Electro Kid confessing the next day to having used the water destroyed bog roll and being none the wiser.

115. The Mega-Ball which was impulsively purchased, kicked at people on the way back to the chalets but then ignored and left to deflate for the rest of the weekend.

116. Quim's beemer badge being the very last thing of the holiday to be Clubflat carded.

117. The Butlins worker who walked through our chalet area wearing a hard hat and us all agreeing that it was probably wise.

118. People referring to painful legs as "beerache".

119. Stu and Quick Buck squeezing into the secret cupboard in Villa number 2 please and generally using it to jump out and scare people in a sufficiently infantile manner.

120. Image's "double scare" (secret cupboard plus wardrobe).

121. Dad bellies on show.

122. Fun Bobby's specialist footwear.

123. The world's most stupidly unnecessary game of football in the baking midday heat.

124. Casual usage of "c**t", "motherfucker" and "motherfucking c**t".

125. Our ability to create untold chaos every night in Chalets number 1, 2 and 3 please.

126. Over use of high-fives with strangers on Saturday night.

127. Quim getting slapped by some "motherfucking c**nt".

128. Plastic "wooden" decking.

129. Cyberdog pretending to be Swedish.

130. Disregard for Laze's carefully planned itinerary.

131. Members of the stag party with an iPhone being told to shave their pubes off.

132. Stu explaining on the phone to someone trying to find us that we were in "Bliss", spelling it "B' as in Bellend, 'L' as in ellend, 'I' as in Illend, 'S' as in sellend".  Then realising we were in Rosso, not Bliss.  "That's 'R' for Rellend...".

133. Quim falling over a Boulder that was bigger than him.

134. Hero chasing Carl as he went to use the toilet of Caravan number 1 please to stop him using the last of their communal toilet paper.

135. Plastering Caravan number 7 please with Clubflat stickers at 6 o'clock in the morning.

136. Older staggers singing 90's cartoon theme tunes to the amusement/dismay of the younger crowd.

137. Seeing some unidentifiable Hulk Hogan stealing a mobility scooter for a grand distance of 10 yards.

138. The sadistic moody Welsh bird who snapped the Hulk Hogan glasses because she didn't want her picture taken, only for her to be pissed off even more when a spare pair was instantly produced in their place.

139. Laze being shot round the space bowl in Splash Waterworld 73 times before succumbing to gravity.

140. Ten of us actually catching 'cancer and AIDS' from the floor of the waterslide waiting area.

141. Eating nails served by Maccy's on Sunday.

142. Being taken the piss out of by chavs whilst wearing Mum towels.

143. Doing the impossible, i.e. losing 15 other Hulk Hogan's on Saturday night.

144. Happy Larry sitting in Image's piss.

145. A quarter of the stag populace being green at any one time.